CRAIG CONLEY (Prof. Oddfellow) is recognized by Encarta as “America’s most creative and diligent scholar of letters, words and punctuation.” He has been called a “language fanatic” by Page Six gossip columnist Cindy Adams, a “cult hero” by Publisher’s Weekly, and “a true Renaissance man of the modern era, diving headfirst into comprehensive, open-minded study of realms obscured or merely obscure” by Clint Marsh. An eccentric scholar, Conley’s ideas are often decades ahead of their time. He invented the concept of the “virtual pet” in 1980, fifteen years before the debut of the popular “Tamagotchi” in Japan. His virtual pet, actually a rare flower, still thrives and has reached an incomprehensible size. Conley’s website is OneLetterWords.com.
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A Turkish Delight of musings on languages, deflations of metaphysics, vauntings of arcana, and great visual humor.
I Found a Penny Today, So Here’s a Thought

April 22, 2018 (permalink)

From Wide Enough For Two: A Farce by Thomas Stewart Denison:

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"Literature is the utterings of the utter."

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"It's the too-tooness of the which what."

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What sort of closing words to The Anatomy of Negation were we expecting?  By Edgar Saltus, 1889.
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The reader is here invited with asterisks to fill in a portrait of a water-nymph according to fancy.  From Some Welsh Legends and Other Poems by John Humphreys Davies, 1893.
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April 21, 2018 (permalink)

This sounds like our Tumblr feed!  My Dark Companions and Their Strange Stories by Henry Morton Stanley, 1893.
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From The Grim Reaper by Oscar Dane, 1918.
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April 17, 2018 (permalink)

It's been said, "Never ask an author how his brain works."  Some of our work has been made available to the general public, here.

"[W]henever I closed my eyes, the letters of the alphabet shifted around like Scrabble pieces and formed words. Those words lined up and soon I imagined entire pages of writing so clearly that I could actually read them, sentence after sentence, as if I were reading straight from a book. A book I had written, with my name on the cover ..." —Jack Gantos

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The Mafulu people of the South Seas believe that when one's ghost leaves the body upon death, it becomes and remains a malevolent being.  From The Ways of the South Sea Savage by Robert Wood Williamson, 1914.
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"Life is a waffle-iron that shuts down on us and squeezes us into nice little squares like all the other waffles in the world."  From McClure's, 1920.
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April 16, 2018 (permalink)

"My country 'tis of everybody else."  From McClure's, 1920.
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April 14, 2018 (permalink)

His paper warned him to finish his book prematurely: the final words of The Writing-Desk and Its Contents by Thomas Griffiths, 1844.
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Indeed, very necessary information may seem like a digression.  From A Study in Temptations by John Oliver Hobbes, 1893.
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April 13, 2018 (permalink)

If you consciously mind your own business, fortune telling machines may disregard you as a ghost, even when you try to give them money.  Here's our take on the uncanny phenomenon.
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"Down in my inner self, there passes before me, in slow and sinister review, the memories of days done with, of things for ever over, of the faces of the dead."  From A Phantom from the East by Pierre Loti, 1892.
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April 12, 2018 (permalink)

The road to ruin is marked by memory, ghosts, moonlight, and weeds (not pictured).  From Roman Presences: Receptions of Rome in European Culture, 1789-1945 (1999).
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April 10, 2018 (permalink)

And how true those words are, even today.  Indeed, Bombay is a most elaborate dream, and we're in search of its book of strange questions.  From From Egypt to Japan by Sarah Graham Morrison, 1909.
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April 4, 2018 (permalink)

Here's our proof that Papa Emeritus of the Swedish doom metal band Ghost is not a zombie anti-pope.
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April 3, 2018 (permalink)

A reversal of "love me, love my dog": "Love my crystal ball love me."  From A Beginner by Rhoda Broughton, 1894.
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April 2, 2018 (permalink)

There are possible readers of books not yet printed, and here's part of a preface to them.  From Ixora, A Mystery by John Harrison, 1888.
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April 1, 2018 (permalink)

Exactly when, down to the day, will the mystery be brought to light?  Here are two answers:
"Possibly, in some yet undiscovered ruin or tomb, the key may be found to the problem which now puzzles the world: but then it is only a possibility.  There is little doubt that the mystery will remain a mystery until the great day when the sea shall give up its dead and the past be stretched before us like a scroll." —The True Latter-Day-Saints' Herald, 1873
"That, I suppose, will remain a mystery till the day when a[ll] secrets will be cleared up, an[d] a[ll] the deeds o[f] darkness brought to light." —The Brownie of Bodsbeck by James Hogg, 1833
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The silent chimes are not heard.  From Johnny Ludlow by Mrs. Henry Wood, 1901.
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Original Content Copyright © 2018 by Craig Conley. All rights reserved.