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Good Samaritan ScenarioThis phony good Samaritan scenario is the oldest trick in the book. —John Perkins, Attack Proof (2000)
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Did You Hear the One I Just Made Up? |
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From Jonathan Caws-Elwitt:
At work we saw an ad in the paper for
an "Open House" at a naturist (i.e. "nudist") camp in this area. One of
my co-workers, scanning the items on the program, remarked "Oh, it
includes a pancake breakfast."
"Things could get sticky," I quipped.
Literary humorist Jonathan Caws-Elwitt's plays, stories, essays,
letters, parodies, wordplay, witticisms and miscellaneous tomfoolery
can be found at Monkeys 1, Typewriters 0.
Here you'll encounter frivolous, urbane writings about symbolic yams,
pigs in bikinis, donut costumes, vacationing pikas, nonexistent movies,
cross-continental peppermills, and other compelling subjects.
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Wilfred Funk once collected a list of "the most beautiful words in
English." The list includes such words as dawn, tranquil, hush, golden,
halcyon, camellia, myrrh, jonquil, lullaby, and melody. Pictured below
are four more words from Funk's list. Can you guess them? The answer: Top left: AMARYLLIS. Top right: CHIMES. Bottom left: ORIOLE. Bottom right: GOSSAMER. (The answer is in black text on the black background. Highlight it to view.)
There are lots more lists of beautiful (and not so beautiful) English words at A Collection of Word Oddities and Trivia.
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"What kind of fool do you take me for?" A complete dunderhead.
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Check out this funny bio:
Born helpless, nude and unable to
provide for himself, Lore Sjöberg eventually overcame these handicaps
to become a handyman, a handicapper and a handmaiden.
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Flimflamming and HornswogglingFlimflammed. Hornswoggled. The oldest trick in the book. —Barbara Croft, Moon’s Crossing (2003)
Reader Comments:
Jonathan wrote:
Dear Ms. Croft:
I was recently flimflammed, or possibly hornswoggled. I'm okay
with this; but what concerns me is that I don't know the
difference. Are there guidelines that you can furnish that will
allow me, in future, to approach flimflamming and hornswoggling
interactions with a better ability to distinguish the two?
bamboozled,
jc-e
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"Imagine a letter that knows its own composition of straight and curved
members, its image density, its phonemic sound, its linguistic
frequency, its relation to neighbouring letters, its function in a
sentence . . . We're exploring computer art to discover what lives at
the crossroads." —3-D graphic designer Peter Cho
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Original Content Copyright © 2018 by Craig Conley. All rights reserved.
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