CRAIG CONLEY (Prof. Oddfellow) is recognized by Encarta as “America’s most creative and diligent scholar of letters, words and punctuation.” He has been called a “language fanatic” by Page Six gossip columnist Cindy Adams, a “cult hero” by Publisher’s Weekly, a “monk for the modern age” by George Parker, and “a true Renaissance man of the modern era, diving headfirst into comprehensive, open-minded study of realms obscured or merely obscure” by Clint Marsh. An eccentric scholar, Conley’s ideas are often decades ahead of their time. He invented the concept of the “virtual pet” in 1980, fifteen years before the debut of the popular “Tamagotchi” in Japan. His virtual pet, actually a rare flower, still thrives and has reached an incomprehensible size. Conley’s website is OneLetterWords.com.
You've heard of the "undrinkable cup of defeat," but luckily "No one shall ever drink out of it again." An illustration from an 1891 issue of The Strand magazine.
Pictured: Prof. Oddfellow collects his thoughts. Note the eye-shaped lens flare, courtesy of mysterious forces. Sometimes one's heart is in one's throat, and sometimes it's one's third eye.
Did you know that potatoes have stars in their eyes? Here's a piece from Prof. Oddfellow's sketchbook, inspired by Jeff Hawkins' unlikely pairing of vegetables to astronomy.
The text reads, "The so-called eyes of nightshade tubers always connect to form the constellation Cassiopeia, the original 'couch potato.'"
The way sea life keeps track of tides is less poetic than salty romantics would have you believe. (The illustration is from Five Minutes' Stories by Mrs. Molesworth, 1888.)
Though the famed comedian/juggler/alcoholic W. C. Fields made his Broadway debut in 1906 at the age of 26, we're going to register this 1906 image from London's Punch as a precursor to the archetype that later became his signature. The caption reads: "Thoughts for non-thinkers. Be sure you raise no more spirits than you can conjure down."
Did you know that Santa, back when he was svelte, used to deliver presents on New Year's Eve and not Christmas Eve? This illustration is from The Family Magazine, 1840.
One hundred and eighteen years before Twitter, the immature gathered out of doors to exchange "five minutes' stories." (The illustration is from Five Minutes' Stories by Mrs. Molesworth, 1888.)