From the New Yorker, Jan-Mar 1927.  [Via Jonathan Caws-Elwitt]

Q: "Can the man forced into the ditch truthfully say that the black cat brought him bad luck?"

A: No, but the black cat served as harbinger of the man's accursed neighbor who shouldn't be allowed to drive.

From Thinking and Writing Clearly by Stratton, Blossom & Lanphear and illustrated by Corinne Malvern, 1943.

Q: Where is our world going?

A: From age to age, it rolls along.

From The Children's Newspaper, 1936.

From The Australian Women's Weekly, 1964.

"Scientists say dowsing is bunk and list its failures.  Laymen say dowsing works and tell of its successes.  Who is right?"  The laymen are right.  From Fate Magazine, 1956.

Q: "What will the future hold?" 

A: Meltdowns.

From Ohio University's 1981 yearbook.

"Is the machine always right?  The answer is no."  From The Children's Newspaper, 1930.

Q: "How does air act?"

A: Unconscionably. 

From Modern Science in Our Environment by Dull & Mann, 1942.

"Can a mutton-chop wood?  We don't know."  From The Children's Newspaper, 1935.

The Minotaur did have ticks, and they were indeed immortal.  From Current Sauce, 1967.

"Fraternities ... there ain't none!"  From West Virginia Wesleyan's 1912 yearbook.

Q: Who says coffee that lets you sleep has to taste "tired"? (Together, 1959)

A: We do!

Q: "Do your studies haunt you?"

A: Yes, quite literally!  But we exorcise them into books like Of Feeding & Caring For Sheet Ghosts.

From Northwest Christian College's 1952 yearbook.

The answer is right there above the question: there are two me's (contrary to the popular expression, "me, myself, and I").  From Mysteries: An Investigation Into the Occult, the Paranormal and the Supernatural by Colin Wilson, 2006.

We fact-checked this question.  It's true that all men named Al are called "Big Al," and science is no closer to an explanation than it ever has been.  From Who Cares About Apathy by Ludlow Porch.

"Who says things are changing?" asks Northeastern's 1968 yearbook.

"I do," answers Bernie Ammons (Sports Illustrated, 1967).  (Though it seems as though Mr. Ammons is answering the question before Northeastern asks it, yearbooks are usually dated a year ahead.)

It absolutely won't be a turkey, because turkeys are drawn by tracing one's fingers, as everyone knows.  It's a pet snowman.  From Shapes by Mary Tom Riley, 1991.

Q: "Ever had an intelligent thought cross your mind?" (The Gateway, 1980.)

A: Only a contumnuous one.

Q: Who said Hollywood is slipping?

A: We did! 

From The Film Daily, 1947.

"The old nursery form runs, 'Riddle-me-riddle-me-ree, p'raps you can't tell me what this may be?'  My reply runs, 'No.  Upon my life, I can't.'" —Charles Dickens, Our Mutual Friend