The famous six-word story popularly attributed to Hemingway, "For sale: baby shoes, never worn," pales in comparison to this six-word headline: "Man on lonely beach sees UFO."  While the Hemingwayesque story is tragic, it's excruciatingly mundane.  Yes, life is fragile—welcome to reality.  We can see why Hemingway got credited with this six-word story — he wrote about how The Sun Also Rises and how it rains in spring, other excruciatingly ordinary topics.  Mortality, sunrises, and rainfalls aren't interesting.  Granting that the headline recalls The Old Man and the Sea, the flash of extraterrestrial mystery saves it from humdrum existence.

We spotted a sort of follow-up headline, from six years later.  Another man on a lonely beach (at 2:30 a.m.) saw a UFO float in with the tide.

Headlines courtesy of UFO Newsclipping Service, 1975, 1981.

"No secerts any more" -- from back in 1965.

"Mystery apparently unraveled.  Bigfoot's named Butch."  From UFO Newsclipping Service, 1974.

"Can you enjoy being a housewife?"  Without irony, we'd recommend wrinkle-free fabrics and wrinkle-releasing sprays.  From Awake magazine, 1961.

We applaud this headline (finally, news we can believe!) and also the portrait for depicting the thrice great Charles Fort with a halo.  From UFO Newsclipping Service, 1990.  The headline reads, "Fortean followers are keeping spirit of the weird alive."

From an era when journalism still had integrity: "Something strange is going on."  From UFO Newsclipping Service, 1993.

Reblog if "swat life" is something we're born into, not something we choose.  From Swarthmore's 1994 yearbook.

This is the one and only occurrence of the phrase "de-monsterably shy," making it a Googlewhack.  From UFO Newsclipping Service, 1985.

With the advent of political correctness, physicists no longer stomp on tiny space aliens, not even with scientific rigor.  From UFO Newsclipping Service, 1970.  The headline reads, "U.S. physicist steps on little green men."

"Snicker if you like but [cryptozoologists] don't care."  They write stuff like How to Spot the Loch Ness Monster Every Time and A Field Guide to Identifying Unicorns by Sound.

From UFO Newsclipping Service, 1989.

"Canada doesn't exist."  From The Varsity, Sept. 10, 1975.

Wookie tracks (like Bigfoot) and flying saucers perplex the Vaders, years before the debut of Star Wars.  From UFO Newsclipping Service, 1971.

Not every flying donut one sees is necessarily a UFO -- one's eyes may simply be glazed.  From UFO Newsclipping Service, 1985.

It's still true that Chicago gets progressively farther away.  To this day, no two explanations agree.  From The Hophinsville Kentuckian, April 5, 1913

"Elizabethan atmosphere will prevail."  It's the best news, especially for those of us related to every Shakespeare authorship contender.  This headline is from the Muhlenberg Weekly, 1938.  For how we proved our connection to every Shakespearean contender, see our video as well as Heirs to the Queen of Hearts.

"Something happened, but it wasn't worth the wait."  From The Varsity, Oct. 31, 1975.

From There is No Death by Florence Marryat, 1891.

Reblog if you either majored or minored in dreaming.  From Santa Clara's 1987 yearbook.  The text reads, "Learning in a dreamworld.  Not paying attention in class means expanding the imagination for daydreamers."

"Stars are falling."  A headline from the Muhlenberg Weekly, 1939.

"Mass psychology gaining momentum."  A headline from the Muhlenberg Weekly, 1939.