CRAIG CONLEY (Prof. Oddfellow) is recognized by Encarta as “America’s most creative and diligent scholar of letters, words and punctuation.” He has been called a “language fanatic” by Page Six gossip columnist Cindy Adams, a “cult hero” by Publisher’s Weekly, a “monk for the modern age” by George Parker, and “a true Renaissance man of the modern era, diving headfirst into comprehensive, open-minded study of realms obscured or merely obscure” by Clint Marsh. An eccentric scholar, Conley’s ideas are often decades ahead of their time. He invented the concept of the “virtual pet” in 1980, fifteen years before the debut of the popular “Tamagotchi” in Japan. His virtual pet, actually a rare flower, still thrives and has reached an incomprehensible size. Conley’s website is OneLetterWords.com.
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I Found a Penny Today, So Here’s a Thought

April 30, 2018 (permalink)

Exclusive: The Surprising Meaning of "If You Have Ghosts, You Have Everything"

 

As the lyric says, "If you have ghosts, you have everything."
So sang the American psychedelic rocker Roky Erickson in 1981 and the Swedish doom metal band Ghost in 2013.
But what in this world or the next does that song lyric mean?
Did you know that hidden within the song is a magickal diminishing spell?  Or that occult subtexts are woven into the letters of the words?  We'll lift the lid on everything, but if you are prone to hauntings or sensitive to dark influences, please don't continue.
When we do a Venn diagram of the song's most famous line, "If you have ghosts, you have everything,"
we expose a mystical All-Seeing-Eye-in-the-Pyramid that is at the center of this song.  Whether or not songwriter Roky Erikson is part of the Illuminati or Freemasonry,
we can interpret this ancient symbol as depicting the building of one's consciousness toward higher understandings.

First of all, what are these ghosts, exactly?
They can be interpreted as lost loves (as the old saying goes, it's better to have lost in love than never to have loved at all), 
one's shadow self (knowledge of which is crucial to one's psychological integration), 
haunting memories,
personal demons (one has to recognize one's personal demons before one can overcome them), 
or spirit guides.
That phrase, "if you have ghosts," contains hidden meanings within its letters.  
They rearrange to read, "give UHF [ultra-high-frequency] soothsay," referring to powerful magickal pronouncements, 
and "ashy hooves fugit," which means that one must walk the walk after talking the talk.  The ashy hooves, of course, conjure images of a goat-legged demon from hell.
The lyrics suggest that you can say and do anything you want, because having ghosts doesn't control one's words or impede one's actions as if one were a spirit medium.
The next line, "Wine never does that," 
is often heard as "One never does that."  But the word "wine" makes sense, as alcohol is the wrong sort of spirits. 
But if you like the word "one," it also works in the sense of helpers being necessary to facilitate a person's higher understandings.
The next line is, "If you call it surprise, there it is."  Whether the word is "surprise" or "a price," the lyric is saying that the situation is what it is, surprising or not, and it costs what it costs, so you pay the price.
Then we come to the line, "In the night, I am real."  
Within that phrase are hidden four other meanings.
"Aha, emit inner light."  That recalls a "eureka!" or a sudden insight, that the glow of one's personal illumination is more easily seen when not eclipsed by bright sunlight.  
"Latin enigma hither" is a calling forth of a mysterious spell from a grimoire.
"Inheriting a Hamlet" refers to the Shakespearean character who was haunted by the ghost of his father.  
Hamlet's life was like a "nightmare," but he sought opportunities to "heal in it."
The phrase "I am real" in itself contains two other meanings.
The Spanish/Latin "alma ire" refers to the spirit soul's righteous anger. In Japanese, "alma rei" refers to a ghost's amenities or useful features.

In the next lyric, we learn that the moon to the left is a part of his thoughts.
This is where the secret diminishing spell is hidden.  
Note how the phrase "is a part of my thoughts" is reduced as it is repeated, until only two words remain. This follows the tradition of the famous "abracadabra" diminishing spell on talismans for curing disease and lessening malefic influences.

The reference to "the left" recalls the left-hand path of black magick. The association of the moon with the left side is depicted in Michelangelo's painting of God's creation of the heavens. The moon is at God's left hand.
A moon illuminated on the left is waning, symbolic of weakening, losses, and aging.  The waning moon is identified by holding one's left hand toward it and seeing if the curve of the crescent corresponds to the curve of one's thumb.
The lyric that the waning moon is a part of oneself is quite profound. It's saying that life's losses don't detract from oneself but are actually a part of the whole, just as an erasure is part of a page.

Some listeners will hear "the man to my left" instead of "the moon," and that's legitimate, too. Even "the man in the moon" is present within the song, as sensitive folk will be able to confirm.

Another key line in the song is, "Forever is the wind."
This phrase hides four other meanings.
"Feverish writ done" refers to an impassioned magickal command being completed.  
"Review fetid horns" means taking stock of one's demonic nature that has turned foul.  
"View strife, dehorn" means reviewing conflicts and nipping them in the bud.
"Terrified hen's vow" refers to the Black Pullet grimoire, a necromantic science of magickal talismans.
Finally, we encounter this lyric: "I don't want my fangs too long."
This sounds like not wanting overly elongated teeth, like beavers who must wear them down.  But consider a vampire who finds eternal life its own sort of hell and dreams of dying.  Such a vampire might wish for fangs not lasting too long a time.
It's traditional at this juncture to ask what you personally think the song means. Please forgive us letting that invitation pass.  It's been a long night.
See our own video clip concluding that Ghost's Papa Emeritus is not a zombie anti-pope.
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April 22, 2018 (permalink)

From Wide Enough For Two: A Farce by Thomas Stewart Denison:

***

"Literature is the utterings of the utter."

***

"It's the too-tooness of the which what."

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What sort of closing words to The Anatomy of Negation were we expecting?  By Edgar Saltus, 1889.
#nothingness
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The reader is here invited with asterisks to fill in a portrait of a water-nymph according to fancy.  From Some Welsh Legends and Other Poems by John Humphreys Davies, 1893.
#poetry #asterisks #water nymph
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April 21, 2018 (permalink)

This sounds like our Tumblr feed!  My Dark Companions and Their Strange Stories by Henry Morton Stanley, 1893.
#vintage book #book #strange story #dark companion
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From The Grim Reaper by Oscar Dane, 1918.
#death #grim reaper
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April 17, 2018 (permalink)

It's been said, "Never ask an author how his brain works."  Some of our work has been made available to the general public, here.

"[W]henever I closed my eyes, the letters of the alphabet shifted around like Scrabble pieces and formed words. Those words lined up and soon I imagined entire pages of writing so clearly that I could actually read them, sentence after sentence, as if I were reading straight from a book. A book I had written, with my name on the cover ..." —Jack Gantos

#magick #occult #esoteric #prof. oddfellow #writing #letter cubes #authors on tumblr #prism glasses #writers on tumblr
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The Mafulu people of the South Seas believe that when one's ghost leaves the body upon death, it becomes and remains a malevolent being.  From The Ways of the South Sea Savage by Robert Wood Williamson, 1914.
#life after death #spirit #afterlife #ghost self #malevolent
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"Life is a waffle-iron that shuts down on us and squeezes us into nice little squares like all the other waffles in the world."  From McClure's, 1920.
#vintage illustration #waffle #illustration #life
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April 14, 2018 (permalink)

His paper warned him to finish his book prematurely: the final words of The Writing-Desk and Its Contents by Thomas Griffiths, 1844.
#writing
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Indeed, very necessary information may seem like a digression.  From A Study in Temptations by John Oliver Hobbes, 1893.
#digression
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April 13, 2018 (permalink)

If you consciously mind your own business, fortune telling machines may disregard you as a ghost, even when you try to give them money.  Here's our take on the uncanny phenomenon.
#video
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"Down in my inner self, there passes before me, in slow and sinister review, the memories of days done with, of things for ever over, of the faces of the dead."  From A Phantom from the East by Pierre Loti, 1892.
#memory #faces of the dead
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April 12, 2018 (permalink)

The road to ruin is marked by memory, ghosts, moonlight, and weeds (not pictured).  From Roman Presences: Receptions of Rome in European Culture, 1789-1945 (1999).
#memory #ghosts #moonlight #road to ruin
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April 4, 2018 (permalink)

Here's our proof that Papa Emeritus of the Swedish doom metal band Ghost is not a zombie anti-pope.
1189
#video
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April 3, 2018 (permalink)

A reversal of "love me, love my dog": "Love my crystal ball love me."  From A Beginner by Rhoda Broughton, 1894.
#crystal ball
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April 2, 2018 (permalink)

There are possible readers of books not yet printed, and here's part of a preface to them.  From Ixora, A Mystery by John Harrison, 1888.
#preface #dedication #author's note
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April 1, 2018 (permalink)

Exactly when, down to the day, will the mystery be brought to light?  Here are two answers:
"Possibly, in some yet undiscovered ruin or tomb, the key may be found to the problem which now puzzles the world: but then it is only a possibility.  There is little doubt that the mystery will remain a mystery until the great day when the sea shall give up its dead and the past be stretched before us like a scroll." —The True Latter-Day-Saints' Herald, 1873
"That, I suppose, will remain a mystery till the day when a[ll] secrets will be cleared up, an[d] a[ll] the deeds o[f] darkness brought to light." —The Brownie of Bodsbeck by James Hogg, 1833
#mystery
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March 30, 2018 (permalink)

Here's 59 seconds on how to make a physical reality of your imagination:
Mindful attention was the meditative practice of Portuguese philosopher Fernando Pessoa. His technique empowered him to make a physical reality of his imagination, through what he called a great act of intellectual magic. His Book of Disquiet demonstrates exactly how to do that, entertainingly. Pessoa kept notes on what happened around him, from a sudden thunderclap to what the office boy just said, and he allowed every occurrence to inform and illustrate his personal philosophy, that we can sift out what parts of reality are illusions and which illusions have reality, and that we can prevent any act from being in vain so as to conserve energy. Depending upon how you look at it, Pessoa said, anything can be either astonishing or an obstacle. His secret was to look at each thing that happened differently every time, as a way of renewing and multiplying it. He said a contemplative soul who never left his village could in this way have the entire universe at his disposal. Pessoa's meditation was a magical act of transformation. I'm Prof. Oddfellow.
#prof. oddfellow #video
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March 27, 2018 (permalink)

Here's an anecdote about how a restless spirit was charmed into the shape of a fly and read into a bottle by 12 parsons standing in a circle.  Note how the parsons made a mistake when they threw the bottled ghost down a well: they committed it to lie for a hundred years, forgetting to specify "a hundred years and odd," thereby allowing the ghost the escape in due time.  From Chambers's Journal, 1866.
#bottled ghost
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