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unearths some literary gems.
From Murder at Maddlingley Grange, by Caroline Graham:***[Casual Paradoxes dept.]It was becoming obvious that the Gibbses were not even going to have the decency to run true to form. Typical.***[One character in this novel fancies himself a stand-in for Sherlock Holmes. He's a "tarsome" (my borrowing, not Graham's) humbug, and the narrator notes that his attempt to stride around the room in the manner of his hero might be described as more Marxian than Holmesian. A few choice moments from his scenes...]a. [Derek] managed to look simultaneously thrilled and complacent, which remarkable accomplishment impressed everyone far more than the lecture on the history of detective fiction.b. Then she stretched out her arms and started to move in circles, rhythmically and very slowly: one, two, three. One, two, three. Her white linen skirt spun palely out and the glass berries on her hat shivered. Her head was cocked in an attitude of surprised happiness as if suddently alerted to the music of the spheres[....][Derek] did not know what to do. Holmes's suspects might have drawn a revolver or thrown a punch when his probing became too incisive. They /never/ went into their dance.c. 'Now--I shall be interviewing in the library and will require you to come in one at a time.''Well, I'm not going anywhere one at a time,' said Simon. 'I'm going back to sleep.'***
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unearths some literary gems.
From Eric Barker's autobiography:
"I remember my grandfather on my mother's side as a kind of drooping, wet moustache with a man behind it..."
"I can get a lot of pleasure out of seeing a horse run across a field, but no more in seeing two and wondering which will win."
About a childhood neighbor:
"I can recall nothing about him save that he had charm, and was wont to utter metaphysical platitudes on the most inappropriate pretexts."
[Btw, the scrap of paper that I used to mark the facing pages containing the last two items above was, I noted with amusement later, marked "HORSE"/"PLATITUDES," which I'd done with no awareness of the wordplay thus executed.]
Regarding his catchphrase (also the title of the book), "Steady, Barker!":
"I have had letters from those who said it helped them to cure a lifelong habit of swearing, as they were able to use it instead. One old lady who shared a flat with an awkward sister at Cheltenham said they had been in danger of drfiting apart, but that now, lo! when they reached a point when it seemed neither could endure the bickering a moment longer, they both said 'Steady, Barker!' and it cleared the air."
And, to come full circle, here's his description of a man who approached him on a path one day, whose appearance inspired a character:
"[He] had a moustache that seemed to take up a good proportion of the width of the path..."
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unearths some literary gems.
From Finishing Touches by Jean Kerr:
Elsie:
I had four years of Latin in high school and I can't even read sundials!
***
Katy:
Why in heaven's name would you have her bring me a book in Latin?
Fred:
I wanted you to have a sense of upmanship.
***
[From one of the seduction scenes...]
Felicia:
Okay, come right this minute, just as you are. If you look back, you turn into a pillar of something.
Jeff:
A pillar of the community, maybe.
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unearths some literary gems.
[This book, published in 1921, contains an epigraph from the future.]
***
“And every week you opened your hoard
Of truthful and tasteful tales—
How you sat on the knees of the Laureate Lord,
How you danced with the Prince of Wales—
And we knew that the Sunday Times had scored
In Literature and Sales.”
To Margot in Heaven.
By Clarence G. Hennessy (circa 1985).
***
[As it turned out, Margot (Asquith) died in 1945, at the age of 81--so 1985 was a pretty safe choice! (And I like the hedging implied by "circa.") But the really good news is that Clarence G. Hennessy appears to exist only for the purpose of attributing the epigraph. That is, there's no evidence of him elsewhere in this book, nor in Google.]
***
Parody should be brief, just as autobiography should be long—ars brevis, vita longa.
***
I was christened Margarine, of course, but in my own circle I have always been known as Marge.
***
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unearths some literary gems.
From Idle Thoughts of an Idle Fellow, by Jerome K. Jerome:What readers ask nowadays in a book is that it should improve, instruct, and elevate. This book wouldn't elevate a cow.***
From Dewey Decimated, by Charles A. Goodrum:"My mother named me Betty and my father was afraid I'd disappear into a sea of Betty Joneses so he put the Crighton in the middle. I managed to slip out of the Betty about the ninth grade and never looked back."
***
From one of Simon Brett's Charles Paris novels:
Impresario Marius Steen, the man behind such stage successes as One Thing After Another, Who's Afraid of the Big Bed Wolf? and, of course, his current smash-hit at the King's Theatre, Sex of One and Half a Dozen of the Other...
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unearths some literary gems.
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unearths some literary gems.
***
[This exchange doesn't really make sense--the people speaking, a pair of Broadway dancers, are not in the employ of Scotland Yard, and in any case they don't seem to understand the correct meaning of the 'royal we'--but I thought you'd still enjoy hearing about the "Broadway we."]
"When you say 'we,' Penny, do you mean the 'royal we,' as in Scotland Yard?"
Penny shook her head. "I mean the 'Broadway we,' as in you and me."
***
[Rhetorical Questions, Answered dept. The fashion mag provided a clue that the protagonists now wish they'd never stumbled on.]
"Oh, Penny, why did you have to buy that fashion magazine? Why didn't you buy the Saturday Evening Post or Popular Mechanics?"
"Because we work Saturday nights and we don't have a car."
***
Bonus: "the thin mustache that looked more like an afterthought than a mark of distinction"
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unearths some literary gems.
From a Jules Feiffer memoir:***My girlfriend, Judy Sheftel... had an old-fashioned, forties movie star face with eyes that shared secrets although it wasn't always clear to me what they were.***From Evenings with Cary Grant, by Nancy Nelson:[According to the author, CG told the following anecdote]"I've always been apprehensive about serving as a master of ceremonies since introducing my colleague Walter Pidgeon one night and hearing myself say, 'Mr. Privilege, this is indeed a pigeon.'"
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