From The Game by Jack London, 1905.

"Threw the meat about the floor," from Gleanings from Popular Authors, 1885.

"The dream of Charlemagne," from The Book of Romance by Andrew Lang, 1902.

"We didn't waste much time looking at each other."  From "My Messenger Call-Box," in Cassell's, 1893.

Monkey versus parrot: which would you wager to win?  Plus, here's some maledicta from a c. 1890 ad for luncheon meat.

"May the black cat's gleam bring joy to you on Hallowe'en."  From 1928.

Three members of the 72nd Squadron in Hawaii, 1928, courtesy of the San Diego Air & Space Museum Archives.

"For pity sake gentleman, be calm," 1881.

From Gleanings from Popular Authors, 1885.

From Iconologia, 1764.

"Did you see me get the best of him?"  From 1881.

"The doughnut squabble."  From Forest Glen by Elijah Kellogg, 1877.

"The interruption to the duel," from The Skeleton Horseman or the Shadow of Death, 1866.

"Machine in action," from , 1903.

You've seen Johan Deckmann's Smart Ways to Use Poetry in a Street Fight.  Though only the book's cover has survived, we speculated that (if the physicists are right about multiple universes) there's some world in which the book's pages exist.  Through the powers of several arcane tools at our disposal, we were able to purloin five fragments.  We present them here, exclusively.  The first is an advertisement from the book's front matter, for a Lord Byron-branded boxing glove "used in every important poetic convention."  (The ad notes that "unprotected figures" are "protected by hyperbole.")  The second fragment instructs on how to deal with "a cowardly poet of society" by throwing him on his face.  The third recommends grabbing the "pencil-hand" and using an enjambment to incapacitate any "poetaster" who has whipped out a synecdoche.  The fourth involves using a powerful blank verse to leave someone curled in a ball, or an epigram to slash a bone in two.  The final fragment addresses how difficult it is for an idle rhymer to train and offers a tip for the writing desk.  (The book was, of course, second-hand, and the red markings on the pages are as we found them.)