"For years I suffered in silence!"  From Movie Classic, 1936.

We can answer the third question about who killed us and with what, when, and where: it was Miss Scarlet, in the library just now, with the candlestick.  From The Aberree, 1954.  

"Empty and uneventful."  In parts one, two, three, and four, we saw how Dark Shadows beat Seinfeld to be the first show about nothing. 

A surrealist, dadaistic, even post-contemplationist spoof of slow-moving Gothic soap operas of the 1970s, from the minds of Jonathan Caws-Elwitt and Prof. Oddfellow: it's Grave Mood Rings, a weird intersection in the universe of Penetralia.

"'I want to know every Shangri-la in the world,' she told him, but he just looked at her."  From The Old Line, 1943.

From Flying Saucer News, 1961.

"A short time that terror has made ageless."  From Dark Shadows episode 41.

"If you must accept advice, be sure your advisor isn't a ferret or a mole, you're a 'squirrel.'"  From The Aberree, 1962.  

"I look like a slob.  I never eat breakfast anymore."  From This Is the Life! by Goodspeed & Smith, 1977.

From Movie Classic, 1936.

From the Massachusetts Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals' Our Dumb Animals, 1945.

Reblog if you, too, are the witch, oaf, fairy godmother, and whatever of your household.  From The Rainbow String by Algernon Tassin and illustrated by Anna Richards Brewster, 1921.

"A telephone is an instrument by which one can break an engagement with ease." From Epigrams of Eve by Sophie Irene Loeb and illustrated by Ruby Lind, 1913.

"Why should I be troubled about nothing?"  From Dark Shadows episode 228.

From The Bradley Tech, 1928.

From Ginn English Grade 8, 1984. 

From Flying Saucer News, 1963.

This fragment of a poem by Ellen Ann Ragsdale echoes the remarkable description of the intermediary Bardo state in the Tibetan Book of the Dead.  From the University of Arkansas' 1968 yearbook.

A spirit message from 1930, by a dearly departed "Charlotte": "Am having a wonderful time.  Wish you could be here with me."