From the notebooks of humorist Jonathan Caws-Elwitt:
Thank you for calling
Gratitech.
If you are calling to be thanked for calling, please
press 1.
If you are calling to thank us for answering, please press 2.
If you would like to be thanked for pressing 2, please press 3.
If you are calling to say "you're welcome", please hold, and a representative will be with you as soon as possible.
(Literary humorist Jonathan Caws-Elwitt’s plays, stories, essays, letters, parodies, wordplay, witticisms and miscellaneous tomfoolery can be found at Monkeys 1, Typewriters 0. Here you’ll encounter frivolous, urbane writings about symbolic yams, pigs in bikinis, donut costumes, vacationing pikas, nonexistent movies, cross-continental peppermills, and other compelling subjects.)
