"Only the nothingness of being in limbo."  Today's moment of existential angst is from Dark Shadows.  In parts one, two, three, and four, we saw how Dark Shadows beat Seifeld to be the first show about nothing. 

"Reading too many Gothic novels"  From Dark Shadows episode 621.  See Grave Mood Rings: The Novelization.

"Peter Puck wants to know if te greyhound wins by a hare's breadth."  From The Children's Newspaper, 1927.

"Don't work for applause.  Work for results.  The applause will then take care of itself."  From The Kodak Magazine, 1920.

Parody analog horror meets 1970s tropes (like pet rocks, lava lamps, disco music, bell-bottom pants, mirror balls, and of course mood rings) in the web series Grave Mood Rings. It pokes fast fun at classic slow-moving Gothic soap operas like Dark Shadows and the Canadian series Strange Paradise. In addition to a vampiric Viscount, a castle is home to a groovy Doctor (a phlebotomist, naturally), a jolly housekeeper with her own laugh track, a werewolf Vicar, and an arch-nemesis riddler wearing a Sphinx mask. Corny wordplay, the occasional bizarre sing-a-long, and haunted doughnuts punctuate the proceedings, in the tradition of the sketch comedy of MadTV, Kids in the Hall, and SCTV.

Here's a rhymed note to the reader, apologizing for the "devil in ink."  From A Critical Fable by A Poker of Fun, 1922.

"Tweedledee and Tweedledum were twin brothers, sons of Doodle Rumpty, King of Doodle Island."  From Wide Awake, 1880

A collage of stills from Grave Mood Rings, courtesy of Dare-g on Tumblr.

"I wish my mind were a blank, free of thought, free of feeling, just empty."  From Dark Shadows episode 270.

Groovy Doctor Macaulovich makes contact with a UFO and learns the secret of their mission.

Parody analog horror meets 1970s tropes (like pet rocks, lava lamps, disco music, bell-bottom pants, mirror balls, and of course mood rings) in the web series Grave Mood Rings. It pokes fast fun at classic slow-moving Gothic soap operas like Dark Shadows and the Canadian series Strange Paradise. In addition to a vampiric Viscount, a castle is home to a groovy Doctor (a phlebotomist, naturally), a jolly housekeeper with her own laugh track, a werewolf Vicar, and an arch-nemesis riddler wearing a Sphinx mask. Corny wordplay, the occasional bizarre sing-a-long, and haunted doughnuts punctuate the proceedings, in the tradition of the sketch comedy of MadTV, Kids in the Hall, and SCTV.

From page 188 of The Riddle of the Traveling Skull by Harry Stephen Keeler, 1934.

A collage of stills from Grave Mood Rings, courtesy of Dare-g on Tumblr.

"Peter Puck wants to know if the first person singular was very eccentric."  From The Children's Newspaper, 1924.

"It's a multiple choice—bad, awful, terrible."  From Dark Shadows episode 227.

"Borrowed $9 and deserted his wife."  From the Duluth Evening Herald, 1915.

A collage of stills from Grave Mood Rings, courtesy of Dare-g on Tumblr.

A tip on how to confuse Death in the 11th hour.  Note the rare word longeval and how Beadle puts the yes in yes'erday.  

From Lyrics of the Under World by Samuel Alfred Beadle, 1912.

Mixing vampire humor and 1970s tropes (like pet rocks, lava lamps, disco music, bell-bottom pants, mirror balls, and of course mood rings), the web series Grave Mood Rings pokes fast fun at classic slow-moving Gothic soap operas like Dark Shadows and the Canadian series Strange Paradise. In addition to a vampiric Viscount, a castle is home to a groovy Doctor (a phlebotomist, naturally), a jolly housekeeper with her own laugh track, a werewolf Vicar, and an arch-nemesis riddler wearing a Sphinx mask. Corny wordplay, the occasional bizarre sing-a-long, and haunted doughnuts punctuate the proceedings, in the tradition of the sketch comedy of MadTV, Kids in the Hall, and SCTV. 

A collage of stills from Grave Mood Rings, courtesy of Dare-g on Tumblr.

"I eventually learned the hard way that women are not like fish at all" (Jase Robertson, Good Call).