Q: What, precisely, is a first cousin?
A: The relative who sits closest to the conductor.
(Literary humorist
Jonathan Caws-Elwitt's plays, stories, essays,
letters, parodies, wordplay, witticisms and miscellaneous tomfoolery
can be found at
Monkeys 1, Typewriters 0.
Here you'll encounter frivolous, urbane writings about symbolic yams,
pigs in bikinis, donut costumes, vacationing pikas, nonexistent movies,
cross-continental peppermills, and other compelling subjects.)