"We are first and foremost trapped in the subjective world of the mind and can never exist beyond it as it is our only certainty."
—Maria Beville, Gothic-Postmodernism: Voicing the Terrors of Postmodernity (2009)

"This may surprise you, but corn starch raises the blood glucose faster than ordinary sugar."
—Ragnar Hanas, Type 1 Diabetes in Children, Adolescents, and Young Adults (2007)

Is it true, as Momus suggests, that there are "few tales which would not be improved by the addition of the phrase 'suddenly, a shot rang out'"?  Decide for yourself as we alter the opening lines of . . .

A LOST LIFE by Emily H. Moore

I am the Doctor's wife in the quiet town of Baywood.  Suddenly, a shot rings out.

"I hate everything that does not relate to literature, conversations bore me (even when they relate to literature), to visit people bores me, the joys and sorrows of my relatives bore me to my soul.  Conversation takes the importance, the seriousness, the truth out of everything I think."
—Franz Kafka, from his diary, 1918 (quoted in Metaphor and Memory by Cynthia Ozick)

Speaking of Kafka, have we told you that New Star Books is publishing a book we illustrated entitled Kafka Franzlations: A Guide to the Imaginary Parables?

From Prof. Oddfellow's sketchbook:

Creole classification: pidginholing

"Believe it or not, it's all in how you think about it."
—David Allen, Making It All Work

 

Imagine a game of "What's My Line," in which either a cherub or an imp whispers into a blindfolded panelist's ear.

Are the whispered words pictured on the right of an angelic or a diabolical nature?

Answer: Diabolical. "Within me my rebellious demon whispered, 'Now is the time! Break through into the superluminous, hey?'” —Paul Goodman, The Empire City, 2001, p. 471. (The answer is in black text on the black background. Highlight it to view.)

Prof. Oddfellow reads some penetrating literature: Jonathan Safran Foer's Tree of Codes.

From her lips ampersands and percent signs
Exit like kisses.
—Sylvia Plath, "An Appearance"

Here's a photo of an ampersand kiss.

"We are both deaf and blind, and surrounded by mysteries we don't recognize."
—Geof Huth

"My answer is simple.  Because we need culture, and we have anarchy.”

—Samuel Lipman, Culture and Anarchy (1994)

• what works best for you
• your incredible insecurity
• the individuals involved
• coaching
• a failure to execute
• money management
• a simple choice
• being a coward
• how much weight a name will carry
• behavior
• emotional chemistry
• how you spin it
• hitting a key on the computer
• forming a word
• freedom and choice
• rhythms
• what you know and what you don't
• using your brain
• trusting your gut
• this election
• desire
• dedication
• finding your market
• higher aspirations
• memory
• negotiation
• safety
• character
• what you're throwing out
• blood
• human beings
• one girl
• attitude
• priorities
• accepting responsibility
• which way you pass the butter
• greed
• trust
• control
• whether you want your life to be full of accomplishments and triumphs, laughter and good times, or anger and frustration, bitterness and disappointments

"Okay, this isn't rocket science, I told myself, it's just pizza!" —D.A. Koelbransen, My Li'l Paradise: Built to Last (2010)

On a related note, here's the world's only compendium of things that are not, in fact, rocket science.

"You can call it a hunch or a gut feeling but either way something is not quite right with this picture and it is annoying the hell out of me." —Rebecca Hackney (Love Blooms in a Blizzard), surely not referring to the perfectly perfect picture that is Young Frankenstein.


A still from the perennially hilarious Young Frankenstein.

"This may surprise you, but as many as 4% of all applicants to top colleges never complete their application."
—Andrew Allen, College Admissions Trade Secrets (2001)