CRAIG CONLEY (Prof. Oddfellow) is recognized by Encarta as “America’s most creative and diligent scholar of letters, words and punctuation.” He has been called a “language fanatic” by Page Six gossip columnist Cindy Adams, a “cult hero” by Publisher’s Weekly, a “monk for the modern age” by George Parker, and “a true Renaissance man of the modern era, diving headfirst into comprehensive, open-minded study of realms obscured or merely obscure” by Clint Marsh. An eccentric scholar, Conley’s ideas are often decades ahead of their time. He invented the concept of the “virtual pet” in 1980, fifteen years before the debut of the popular “Tamagotchi” in Japan. His virtual pet, actually a rare flower, still thrives and has reached an incomprehensible size. Conley’s website is OneLetterWords.com.
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A Turkish Delight of musings on languages, deflations of metaphysics, vauntings of arcana, and great visual humor.
August 15, 2010

I Found a Penny Today, So Here's a Thought (permalink)
"It is the custom here, that we go just a little beyond, that we consider each direction with the possibilities of madness and its grand, all-inclusive theatrics, where even minor dreams are worth their weight in gold, when balanced against the darkness out of which they have gestated and taken their cues from the fiercest and loveliest of all the animals."
—surrealist J. Karl Bogartte, "The Weapons of Love"
> read more from I Found a Penny Today, So Here's a Thought . . .
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The Right Word (permalink)
We recently stumbled upon a surprising tip involving one-letter words: someone suggested using them as commands to keep a dog from barking.  (The logic seems to be that dogs can't understand sentences.)

We happily note that in Shakespeare’s time, R was called littera canina, "the dog’s letter," because it sounded like a dog's growl.
> read more from The Right Word . . .
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August 14, 2010

Suddenly, A Shot Rang Out (permalink)
Is it true, as Momus suggests, that there are "few tales which would not be improved by the addition of the phrase 'suddenly, a shot rang out'"?  Decide for yourself as we alter the opening lines of . . .

KUBLA KHAN by Samuel Taylor Coleridge

In Xanadu did Kubla Khan
A stately pleasure dome decree.
Suddenly, a shot rang out
Through caverns measureless to trout
Down to a sunless sea.
> read more from Suddenly, A Shot Rang Out . . .
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Not Rocket Science (permalink)

 
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August 13, 2010

The Ghost in the [Scanning] Machine (permalink)

~ Mysterious Beards ~

Portrait from Walt Whitman’s Complete Writings, recalling his allusion to “window-pierc’d façades.”

“Even if we cannot see the colored shapes as the ghostly portrait of a man, we do see the colors as something.” —Marc Bekoff

> read more from The Ghost in the [Scanning] Machine . . .
#ghost #walt whitman
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Your Ship Will Come In (permalink)
“Your boat must be able to move in very light airs.” —Lin Pardey


 
> read more from Your Ship Will Come In . . .
#vintage postcard #florida #silver springs
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August 12, 2010

Glued Snippets (permalink)
A bit of irony from a scanned book over at Archive.org: a notice to handle the text carefully due to brittle paper.

---
Alsop Peanutworthy notes:

In my experience, poets are much more brittle than the paper they write, type or publish upon. And this was true even in the pre-acid-free era.

> read more from Glued Snippets . . .
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I Found a Penny Today, So Here's a Thought (permalink)
Vladimir Nabokov: "I confess I do not believe in time. I like to fold my magic carpet, after use, in such a way as to superimpose one part of the pattern upon another. Let visitors trip. And the highest enjoyment of timelessness -- in a landscape selected at random -- is when I stand among rare butterflies and their food plants. This is ecstasy, and behind the ecstasy is something else, which is hard to explain. It is like a momentary vacuum into which rushes all that I love. A sense of oneness with sun and stone. A thrill of gratitude to whom it may concern -- to the contrapuntal genius of human fate or to tender ghosts humoring a lucky mortal."  (via SocialFiction)
> read more from I Found a Penny Today, So Here's a Thought . . .
#butterflies #timelessness #nabokov
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Two Sides / Same Coin (permalink)
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August 11, 2010

Unicorns (permalink)

Clint Marsh, author of The Mentalist's Handbook, shares his lovely review of our unicorn field guide.  We've bolded our favorite bits:

Craig Conley is a true Renaissance man of the modern era, diving headfirst into comprehensive, open-minded study of realms obscured or merely obscure.  A voracious researcher, he possesses both the focus required to compile book-length arcana on a given topic and the objectiveness to consider sources other scholars might ignore.  It is precisely this tendency to "overlook" that forms the basis for Conley's Field Guide.  As he states in the book's introduction, "Because we live in a highly visual world, we rarely exercise the full range of our hearing.  Yet our ears can detect things that our eyes automatically reject.  By listening as opposed to looking, we can avoid overlooking.  Practice can be richly rewarding, whether one is listening for unicorns in particular or neglected delights in general."  And so Conley mines the known literature on unicorns, nobly eschewing distinctions between historical accounts, fantasy novels, and instances of metaphor, organizing the brief excerpts and other tidbits found into 51 short lessons in the art of "deep listening" necessary to perceive the fabulous beasts.  Soundwave diagrams impart insight into audible tendencies of the unicorn as rustling, laughter, mimicry of orchestral instruments, soft nickering, cries of ruin, and the creature's alarm "sneeze."  More complex diagrams contribute to the mapping of the once well-maintained highways between magic and science, illuminating such correspondences as the Fibonacci Spiral with the shape of the outer ear and the comparative curl of the unicorn's horn with that of the human cochlea.  Conley also offers an companion compact disc with four tracks of listening exercises set in a sylvan soundscape.  Narrator Michael Warwick guides the listener through the first half of the CD, then departs, leaving only the birdsong and delicate, layered crackle and murmur of the forest and whatever one might discover there.  This book and recording are fine works of practical esoterica.  Highly recommended.
The Pamphleteer
> read more from Unicorns . . .
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Semicolon Moons (permalink)

WANING GIBBOUS (FUTURE)

"There followed the period of nothing-to-do-but-wait."

—Ivan Doig, This House of Sky (1980)


 
> read more from Semicolon Moons . . .
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Puzzles and Games :: Which is Funnier (permalink)
Which number is funnier: 16 or 18?

Clue:  This is according to the play Mr. 80% by James Sherman

Answer:  16  (The answer is in black text on the black background.  Highlight it to view.)

Citation:  James Sherman, Mr. 80% (1987), p. 14
> read more from Puzzles and Games :: Which is Funnier . . .
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August 10, 2010

I Found a Penny Today, So Here's a Thought (permalink)
We're honored to be referenced in an article about "A Surprising Historical Source of Sustainability":

Perhaps Portmeirion’s greatest achievement is the creation of a built environment that forces its occupants to question preconceptions about the world that they inhabit. As author Craig Conley points out, the setting is more of a virtual reality. The project exists as a series of contradictions that allow nothing to be taken at face value. The village has a town hall, but no residents and a lighthouse with no light. It is a port on an estuary too shallow for most watercraft. The result is a series of opportunities for expectations to be defied which, in turn, prompts visitors into a mindset of inquisition.

See the entire article here.
> read more from I Found a Penny Today, So Here's a Thought . . .
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The Ghost in the [Scanning] Machine (permalink)

~ Mysterious Beards ~

Portrait of Henry Longfellow from Evangeline.

In the ghostly signature, there is no “fellow” in “Longfellow,” as befits the nature of the spirit world.

> read more from The Ghost in the [Scanning] Machine . . .
#ghost #longfellow
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Suddenly, A Shot Rang Out (permalink)
Is it true, as Momus suggests, that there are "few tales which would not be improved by the addition of the phrase 'suddenly, a shot rang out'"?  Decide for yourself as we alter the opening lines of . . .

MOBY DICK by Herman Melville

Call me Ishmael. Some years ago—never mind how long precisely—having little or no money in my purse, and nothing particular to interest me on shore, I thought I would sail about a little and see the watery part of the world. Suddenly, a shot rang out.
> read more from Suddenly, A Shot Rang Out . . .
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August 9, 2010

Did You Hear the One I Just Made Up? (permalink)
The idiom "an elephant in the room" postdates Houdini's death.
> read more from Did You Hear the One I Just Made Up? . . .
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Presumptive Conundrums (permalink)
INSTRUCTIONS: Click on the puzzle image below to reveal one possible solution.

You Do the Math - Presumptive Conundrums
> read more from Presumptive Conundrums . . .
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The Right Word (permalink)
From Prof. Oddfellow's sketchbook:

Text by Geof Huth.
> read more from The Right Word . . .
#eye #diagram #tooth
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August 8, 2010

It's Really Happening (permalink)
Saturn's ethereal aura has a heartbeat.

The foreground photo of this collage is from the wrongfully-canceled comedy series Arrested Development.
> read more from It's Really Happening . . .
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Go Out in a Blaze of Glory (permalink)
"The joker-god Maui has the same attitude as Ludwig II—you can't have too much loud color and bright contrast, and to hell with critics who want the 'understated.'" —Robert Anton Wilson, Cosmic Trigger II

Left, a detail of a canvas depicting Ludwig II as the king of castles, sporting an architectural beard.  Right, Maui of Oceanian mythology.
> read more from Go Out in a Blaze of Glory . . .
#king #ludwig ii
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