This is what we say everywhere we go: "Where's your crystal ball?  I expected to see a crystal ball."  From Dark Shadows episode 1073.

It's still difficult to get anyone to bring you the candles of the seven secrets.  It's like they don't want you to exorcise the ghost.  "'I want you to go home and come back here immediately, and bring with you the candles.  The candles of the seven secrets.'  'No.'"  From Dark Shadows episode 1005.

It's great advice: never discuss or analyze dreams with people who weren't in the dream.  In this scene from Dark Shadows episode 327, young David is disinclined to brainstorm with Burke because Burke hadn't appeared in his dream.  He says that only the ghost Sarah could decode the dream because she had been in it.

The day David Selby coudn't follow the labyrinthine plots anymore.  From Dark Shadows episode 1086.

"There are only 12 different types of faces in the world, yet we're constantly amazed at people who look alike."  From Dark Shadows episode 1073.

"All these centuries, all that men have accomplished, and yet we know knowing about what's going to happen tomorrow."  From Dark Shadows episode 1073.

There's a fine line between general haunting and specific ghosts.  From Dark Shadows episode 161.

If you're ever bricked into a wall, may someone hold up a candle before the final brick is placed, "so you will always remember what the light was like."  From Dark Shadows, episode 442.

"Everything that's happening must be leading to something."  From Dark Shadows episode 1014.

"I'm getting pretty good at accumulating guilts."  "And I'm not going to feel guilty about it at all."  From Dark Shadows episodes 1007 and 563.

What to do when the lead character takes over a month off a daily TV series?  Have him chained in a coffin, unable to witness or deal with the terrors and horrors swirling around him.  That's what happens in Dark Shadows.  Our sampling of stills are from episodes 984, 989, 990, 991, 994, 995, 998.  Over twenty episodes begin by mentioning how Barnabas Collins is unaware of the frightening drama.  Yeah, we noticed!

How true those words are, even today: "Never trust scholarly magazines."  From Dark Shadows episide 475.

In this scene from Dark Shadows episode 987, we suspect that each scientist left out at least one word in his line.  When you hear these lines spoken, as opposed to reading the subtitles, it’s even more confusing … especially because the actors’ faces are so deadpan, and they don’t stumble but smoothly leave out words.  They look as though they mean this nonsense and seem to understand each other.  Cue the eerie music, indeed!

Here's what it looks like when your strangler offers you a way to save yourself by inviting you to "Call on your false god!"  From Dark Shadows episode 999.

One of the few scientists in the world who can't subtract just happens to be in Dark Shadows (episode 997).

"Oh, it's fine, but I still don't understand why."  From Dark Shadows episode 1.

"The only way to bring these people back to the truth is to smile and lie just as they do."  From Dark Shadows episode 958.

It's why we let our subscription laspse, too: "Nothing in the papers.  Nothing about sudden horrible death or anyone seeing any mysterious animal."  From Dark Shadows episode 918.

We checked, and it's true that a house can be haunted by terror itself.  From Dark Shadows episode 764.