CRAIG CONLEY (Prof. Oddfellow) is recognized by Encarta as “America’s most creative and diligent scholar of letters, words and punctuation.” He has been called a “language fanatic” by Page Six gossip columnist Cindy Adams, a “cult hero” by Publisher’s Weekly, a “monk for the modern age” by George Parker, and “a true Renaissance man of the modern era, diving headfirst into comprehensive, open-minded study of realms obscured or merely obscure” by Clint Marsh. An eccentric scholar, Conley’s ideas are often decades ahead of their time. He invented the concept of the “virtual pet” in 1980, fifteen years before the debut of the popular “Tamagotchi” in Japan. His virtual pet, actually a rare flower, still thrives and has reached an incomprehensible size. Conley’s website is OneLetterWords.com.
"Who the ___ is the Prince of Good Fellows?" From 1905.Speaking of which, what exactly are a snowball's chances in hell? See A Snowball's Chance in Hell.
The phrase "what clowns drink" is a Googlewhack, but here's your answer. And this is what it looks like to be "off the [circus] wagon." From a 1908 ad in Jugend.
Indeed, a magazine highly skeptical of mysticism and the occult encourages using shadows to trace grotesque, horned entities. From Popular Mechanics, 1928.
"Health is happiness. So think Tom and Jerry; and whenever they have an opportunity, Jerry takes out his watch, and feels his pulse, while Tom looks at his tongue in a small pocket-glass." From Punch, 1877.